Today I got a mailing from onelist; this is a test to see if I can get
one in.
Have been working thru Connie's lessons. I found pivoting very effective
for getting at the basis of any unwanted emotion.
Today I worked with 'inclusion-exclusion' and I found I have a strong
resistance on 'living alone' even although I have had 13 years practise!
If anything it seems somewhat worse than 'being alone' which is from the
same stable!
In being alone, one can fantaise, meditate, get onto the billion
surprises waiting for me on the Net or just shower and go sleep.
But living alone is something continueous, the background music of
wasting life; where one goes to the shop and buys something unwanted, just
to speak to a human being.
Cooking and cleaning etc., seem so pointless and not worth bothering
with, when one is deep into resisting 'living alone'
To counter writing this, I just brought to mind one of the happiest
moments of my life, when I was in Hong Kong, being swept along by a crowd
of over a million people.
Well the point of this mail is that I do not know which process to apply
to this resistance.
I don't think I could appreciate it but I could try loving it, as some
have loved their extra tissue or their spiders.
There is a process called, 'Book of positive aspects', I haven't seen
that but I already know one positive aspect, "This also passes."
Eric.
