Dedicated l'ilui nishmas Glickel Chana bas R' Chaim a"h
SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM ?
Day 148 ¨C No Revenge ?
Condition #7:
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The final condition necessary to permit speaking what would otherwise be rechilus for a constructive purpose is that conveying the information does not cause undue harm to the subject. Constructive intent does not justify causing harm to another person.
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Therefore, one cannot inform a person that someone else is about to harm him if the person will respond by harming the plotter. This applies not only to physical or financial retaliation, but even to retaliation in the form of loshon hora in a manner prohibited
by halachah.
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? SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON ? A Study in Contrasts ?
In summation: A Jew must strive to develop positive character traits, especially with regard to traits that have a major impact on interpersonal relationships. One must strive to assist his fellow to the best of his ability and overlook his fellow¡¯s faults
just as he would want others to overlook his own faults. If one¡¯s friend has expressed his anger toward someone else, he should do his best to soothe that anger through reason and explanation ¡ª a demonstration of true wisdom and inner strength.
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A wicked person behaves in the very opposite way. He seeks to damage others, to reveal their unintentional misdeeds and claim that they were committed willfully. The wicked person rejoices over another¡¯s failings, and incites others to feud. He prides himself
over his success in such endeavors, as he considers this an indication of his wisdom and might ¡ª but of course he is wrong.
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Midrash Shochar Tov (ch. 52) cites the episode of Doeg¡¯s treachery against David and Achimelech, the Kohen Gadol (High Priest). At a time when King Shaul was in pursuit of David and seeking to harm him, Doeg told Shaul that Achimelech had intentionally helped
David to flee from Shaul, which was a lie. Doeg¡¯s slander brought about Achimelech¡¯s death (see I Shmuel chs. 21-22).
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As the Midrash relates, David told Doeg, ¡°Is a man truly mighty when he sees his fellow at the edge of a pit and pushes him in, when he sees his fellow on top of a roof and pushes him off? On the contrary, a man deserves to be called a mighty warrior when his
fellow is about to fall into a pit and he grasps his hand to prevent his fall or when he lifts the fallen man from the pit. But when you saw that Shaul was angry at me, you persisted in vilifying me.¡¯¡¯ Thus did David say, ¡°Why do you pride yourself with evil,
O mighty warrior?¡¯¡¯ (Tehillim 52:3).
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