I was forming the substance of your last paragraph in my head (about your communication with your husband) when it suddenly appeared. I think that as so-called grown-ups we have learned that the socially acceptable thing to do is to acknowledge another person's conversational contributions in a shared space, whether we are interested or not. It's often just a convention that has little to do with actual engagement. My spouse has recently decided that (especially with me) she will ignore such expectations, firmly implanted during her childhood, and only respond when she's actually interested. After my initial pique at being ignored, I am coming to realize that each of us has our own internal conversation going on most of the time and any attempt to interrupt that flow, albeit well-meaning and intended to establish a connection, probably requires getting some kind of consent first. Just like we would when approaching a conversation between two individual people.?
