Re: Maybe depressing question
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Mary, that's exactly what I meant by preserving maximum flexibility for executors.? Thinking ahead to my someday-duties, what I'd want is to be as free as possible to do whatever was simplest/made the most sense, and have the fewest possible beneficiaries to deal with. I'm glad to hear your estate sale experience was good. Think there's one or more of those in my future, down the road somewhere.
I'm focused now, with my mom, not on actually deciding how to distribute her things, but on making sure we know what she actually has and how much it's worth, and making sure she's properly insured (because, you know, wildfires). That in itself isn't easy! After my dad died in December, we kept discovering yet more financial accounts my mother didn't know about/had forgotten about. Most of them tiny, but still had to be dealt with. I'd asked my dad to make a list of everything, and he supposedly had, but quite a few accounts hadn't made it onto that list.
Also Jaya, I agree that it's important to know the stories of objects that have particular significance or history. A story might make the difference between a younger family member wanting something or not. Stories like that meant a lot to my dad - for instance, there's a little antique armoire that his grandfather brought home from China in 1922. He wanted us to know that, and hoped it would eventually stay with one of us.
-Therese Th¨¦r¨¨se Shere
Freelance indexing & digital information design
Ann,?
I my thinking has evolved to align more with your position on our valued possessions.? I've acquired a number of items of great value to me that have cost me a good bit of money.? I have enjoyed them all, but I recognize that they are tools for what many regard as arcane hobbies.?
Fine harmonicas, luthier made ukuleles, big computerized sewing equipment,? spinning wheel, and expensive hand made needle sets, not to mention the expensive yarns kitted up and my craft library of rare books.? Yeah, it's a lot.? Add to that, my husband is known for making 18th century reproduction furniture - who wants "brown furniture" right now?? Almost no one, even if the builder has a good reputation!
I also know that my son and daughter in law have zero interest in? these things.? I don't fault them for that in the least.? I kind of like the fact that they have their own interests and tastes.
I also know that when I'm dead, I'm dead.? I'm pretty philosophical about what happens to the things I've enjoyed during my life.? Once I'm gone, I will no longer be concerned about these valuable items, and I know just how easy it is to dispose of them.? For me, that's what an estate sale or auction is for and my children know that.? I did this with my parents' estate and it was no problem at all.
I've given away some sewing machines to people who will use them and needed them.? I'll probably do this with other things too, but I know it won't be enough to dispose of everything.
When I go, it's all theirs.? They can keep what they wish and dispose of the rest without much trouble.? They are secure in their careers and won't need the $$$ from these bits and bobs.?
I also know that if and when these things are sold, they can donate the funds generated to charity or keep the money: their choice.? I also know whomever acquires these items for a song will cherish them, and that alone makes me happy.? I kind of like the idea of someone finding a steal deal of one of my musical instruments, an instrument they could never have purchased without finding it in an estate sale.
All the other ideas expressed here are wonderful too, but as a lawyer who has handled estates,? I'm most comfortable with having my estate matters and disposition of items as simple as possible.
Mary.
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