Well, life is full of challenges. It is? a blessing to enter the 60s as a couple? with 4 parents all living independently (and doing own housework, gardening and all other chores). However it is always in mind that therer will, at some point, be a heavy price to pay. We started this year with FILs major stroke in Madeira on 26 December 2018 - which led to 12 days in intensive care and a medical transfer back to Glasgow for a further month in hospital. The problem there was that MIL in her shock forgot our telephone number and had not the sense to ask anyone else in their hotel to google us for contact details so it was a week before they got in touch to tell us. The mobile phone was password protected by FIL who was in no state to tell anyone the relevant details. That was quite a saga and we breathed a huge sigh of relief when he came home after treatment and was better than he had been for a long time. Apart from MILs now almost constant falls things were chugging along? until this.
NB MIL could remember son's name and told hospital consultant that he did "a very important job in Switzerland". That was more than enough for Google, which could have managed on the name alone.
It is very disconcerting when a parent who daily reads? both the London Times and Le Monde and compares their stances with interest, suddenly becomes completely disorientated. The hospital kept asking when she had been diagnosed as demented, and I kept saying she had not been because she was normally high functioning. Turned out she was delirious from te UTI. BY the time we got back to the ward yesterday at 2pm she was bright and cheery, exchanging subtle jokes and had given the physio assessment team a detailed and accurate description of her home and its facilities. Could walk, talk, conprehend etc again. Thank goodness. She did admit that - as I had warned the stafff - she had tried to go home but had been baulked because I had taken her clothes home to wash. When I asked why she had needed to go home so urgently she replied that no-one would give her a copy of The Times and she did not have a book to read. We had put a book in her locker but unluckily she had read it before.......she had also missed the pen, her glasses and a few otehr essentials. Well, we left her avidly following the news of the final day before our election and she is very cross that she will not be released in time to vote although I think she will get home late today.
if anyone is still reading along, I hope Ann enjoys her weekend with the grandkids, that Laura's knee heals quickly and that Jacqui's? recovery continues apace. And that everyone else is well for the rest of December.
I always remember the really helpful advice I had from your combined forces when Charlotte had meningitis nearly 8 years ago and how following it did, I am sure, contribute significantly to her eventual recovery to a level where she could qualify as a veterinary surgeon and can live alone and independently while working in her field.
Well, I am pretty sure that tomorrow I shall be working under Mum's generalship, packing parcels for 20 or 30 members of the clan. Everything is laid out on the big spare bed but Dad has no idea which pile of gifts is for which person.
We did have a funny year once when Mum labelled the parcels but a cat knocked the labels off some piles and somehow they were put back on the incorrect ones. Thus older ladies got gifts designed for teenage boys (no totally unsuccessful) but teenage boys who got gifts for older ladies were not quite so entertained.........
Thanks everyone
Jenny
On 11 December 2019 at 23:58 Nilda <nildamesa@...> wrote:
Jenny - really sorry to hear about your mother. What a scare. Good luck, and also with your father. I remember how stressed out my father got when my mom got sick, and it's just hard all around. Jacqui - hope you keep turning that corner and staying turned. And what a lovely little wrap too. Laura - glad it's all heading in the right direction. Now no one else get sick, OK?
Nilda
On Wed, Dec 11, 2019 at 12:32 PM Jenny Swanson <
jenny@...> wrote:
Sorry about your woes, Jacqui. That's hard.
I was interested to hear that the cough with a whoop is going about in the US too. Lots of people in London have had it including my parents for about 2 months. My mother said she must not go to the doctor until she was completely better, even though she felt quite ill, which although public spirited was silly and led to a stroke on Sunday and Monday which we only discovered by accident when she called me using the wrong nouns for things which is not like her. She then picked up a UTI which made her quite delirious and I spent much of last night literally chasing her around the A and E department as she kept leaping off her assessment trolley. Finally after 9 hours (preceded by 3 hr wait for ambulance) they found her a bed on a ward. Hopefully they can get her to stay until tomorrow. Yesterday she discharged herself because "there was nothing wrong? with her" and promptly fell at home and hit her head on the bath. My dad at 88 can't deal with this sort of thing so I am here in London for the week, instead of in Geneva with DH. At least my luggage was already packed and the cat and dog were boarding from Monday anyway.
Hope everyone's lives settle down for the midwinter season
Jenny
On 10 December 2019 at 17:13 "
Connie@..." <
connie@...> wrote:
Wow!? That is a lot to deal with. ? Maybe you could hire a little help for a few weeks to help lessen the load?
Hope you are all on the mend ? ?There is a nasty respiratory bug going around here. ? I literally had it from Oct 7 till Dec 7. ? This is the first week that I actually feel sorta normal. ? ?I sure hope you don’t have the same thing. ? It feels like whooping cough without the signature “whoop.”
The dogs are here to stay.? Marguerite had been put “in charge“ of taking care of them by my sister-in-law when dad was in the intensive care where they wouldn’t let her visit. It was a way for her to ?contribute to the fight to get him well.?
Not surprisingly, when we told her Dad was dying, she became extremely distressed about what would happen to them – as it was clear no one else cared to take them - so we gave her permission to ask?my Dad about adopting them.?
One of the big work challenges is that I was committed to 10 hours of new lectures at a conference this last weekend. Long story short, I finished the last PowerPoint the day before we flew out and had no time to rehearse anything.
In the meantime, because of his historical cancer/chemo, Andrew has the respiratory sensitivity of a canary. Marguerite brought home a little something from school which she immediately cleared but then he incubated it to extreme concentrations. Net result is he, and then she, got really sick. I started breaking with it the morning we were leaving town, but my immune system rallied to get me through my talks and our QFT on the trip this weekend.?
Now I’m back and sicker than a dog - horrible cough, sore throat, headache, nausea, you name it. However, as it often does, the world has smiled on me. I came home to the most lovely surprise from Ann - the perfect thing to wrap around my poor sore throat!! You all are positively the best. Mwah!!!
- Jacqueline?
On Dec 8, 2019, at 9:22 AM, Jaya Srikrishnan <
ermabom@...> wrote:
I am glad you shared it with us. Sharing sometimes somehow lessens the grief or worry. I am sorry for your loss but I am glass your dad was able to be at home at the end. May he rest in peace.?
Ouch! about Marguerite. At least it was only 'almost' and not actually. It must so chaotic with the dogs. Can they be rehomed or do you want to keep them?
Grieving occurs in its own way and in its own time. Being busy does defer it. Lots of hugs for everything.
I am so embarrassed! Somehow I didn’t realize that I was responding on the list serve. Overall, we have more blessings than we can count.?
My father was able to achieve his goal of dying at home, and he did not suffer doing so. This truly was an example of the Holy Spirit moving massive numbers of people in unexpected and unusual ways, for which I will be forever grateful. (For example, a small hospice organization picked up the phone late Saturday afternoon to talk to a social worker - who I think was calling while off for the day - and agreed to take us on that night, with Dad arriving home by medical transport at 9pm. This stuff just DOESN’T happen!) So, really, I have nothing about which to complain.?
That said, we came back to our little home with Dad’s two little dogs in tow and me neck deep overdue on work deadlines. Neither is really house-trained, and both ended up having previously unreported significant medical issues. On top of all that, there are dominance issues with our dog, leading to Marguerite almost getting bitten in the eye - quite literally. (Yikes!)
We are getting it all worked out, and all will be fine in the end. Getting through the day is just logistically tough right now! (Grieving can wait till 2020. Lol.)
- Jacqueline?
On Dec 4, 2019, at 6:05 PM, Jaya Srikrishnan <
ermabom@...> wrote:
Hope all is well Jacqui and the situation eases soon
Sorry it took so long! Things have been kind of hard here.?
- Jacqueline?
Wow! What pretty odd balls.
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Thank you!
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Ann in PA
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Jaya
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Jaya
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