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Sometimes I find myself wishing I hadn’t said or written something soon after the act. This is one of them.

I want to apologize for my comments (“Mea Culpa”) on Monday. And I would like to offer an explanation for what, in hindsight, seems like a gross overreaction to an offhand comment by another person. This may well be TMI, but at this point in my life - as a 74 year-old mostly adult person - I have no problems sharing what I’m about to say.

I suffer from depression, have wrestled with it my entire life. Months will often go by without a hint of the illness, then suddenly it hits me with both barrels, rendering my normal thought processes suspect. That has been the case lately. I have been dealing with the loss of two close friends in the past few months. And Monday was the second anniversary of my godson’s suicide. So my already fragile mental state proceeded to plunge even further into darkness. When I am depressed I obsess on how my behavior, my words, can hurt other people. I become overly sensitive, apologetic, find myself feeling guilty of any number of offenses, real or imagined. And I try to do whatever I can too rectify the situation, or at least make amends. Hence my apologetic message and my impulsive decision to cease posting comments to the group site out of fear of further alienating some members.

I have long been self-conscious being the only group member to post comments the majority of the time. And I have wished others would join me, since they would offer different insights, express appreciation for the finer aspects of some images that didn’t make my radar. To my delight both Jayanand and Rob have mentioned they plan to offer their comments as well. I just hope my infantile outburst did not make them reconsider.

As for myself, I have reconsidered. I will continue to offer my observations after each exchange, but with a slightly different approach. I will do my best to break away from my biases and look at and appreciate all the prints as close to equally as is possible. I am looking forward to seeing new images with new eyes :)