Beth,
It seems sometimes like I'm the only one who never has a problem with the TOC in the wiki.
The result after saving has the?as #1 in the list with the other header 1's following.
Thanks for the screenshots, they were invaluable. It looks to me like you have the TOC marker itself in a paragraph that's marked Header 1 in the Formats selector (leftmost on the formatting toolbar). Change it to Paragraph instead. The TOC marker should go it in its own paragraph. Type the Enter key before and after it to make sure it isn't attached to other text.
When you open the Formats selector the
current
format of the paragraph will be marked with a black bar on the left. Make sure that is set to Paragraph for every paragraph that isn't intended as a section header.
Shal
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