#234

开云体育

SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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The Quality of Silence
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R’ Yitzchak said: Which craft should man pursue in this world? He should make himself like a mute (Chullin 89a).
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R’ Yitzchak’s description of the quality of silence as a craft, conveys a number of important lessons:
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If a person who is unfamiliar with a certain trade seeks to create a product of that trade with his own hands, he will find the task exceedingly difficult, regardless of how simple he may have imagined it to be. To become skilled in a given craft requires a period of training and experience.
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So it is with the art of silence. The ability to restrain oneself from speaking when the situation warrants silence is, indeed, precious. With the quality of silence, man is protected from the many sins which are related to speech; without it, it is exceedingly difficult to refrain from verbal transgression.
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A person who exercises restraint in speech only when the possibility of forbidden speech seems likely, but at all other times speaks whatever comes to mind, will be unable to avoid transgression. Such a person is simply not accustomed to restraining himself in this area, and is totally unprepared when the moment of trial arrives.
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Therefore, one should train himself, like someone learning a craft, to exercise restraint in speech. One must reach the point where such restraint comes naturally to him. Which craft should man pursue in this world? He should make himself like a mute. Then he will surely refrain from forbidden speech and avoid any such sin.

#235

开云体育

SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Debt of Gratitude
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We can suggest another explanation of R’ Yitzchak’s teaching: “Which craft should man pursue in this world? He should make himself like a mute.’’
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Suppose a person suddenly suffers a loss of speech. All the city’s doctors are summoned to suggest a cure, but all fail. Finally, a renowned specialist is brought in from another city. He succeeds in curing the patient and refuses any offer of payment for his services. Imagine the love and gratitude which the patient would feel toward the doctor! His gratitude would be readily apparent; he would run to do the doctor’s every bidding. For the patient to speak a negative word about the doctor would be unthinkable.
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Hashem has given man something which He has not given any other earthly creature — a speaking soul through which he can study Torah and perform other mitzvos, thus earning for himself eternal reward. By the strict measure of justice, a person who has used his tongue hundreds of times to speak the forbidden should awaken one morning to find that he has lost his power of speech. However, Hashem, Whose compassion is boundless and Who is slow to anger, continues to grant this priceless gift as He awaits the person’s repentance.
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How can such a person persist in speaking loshon hora and other forms of evil speech? Is this how one expresses gratitude to the One Above?
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Which craft should man pursue in this world? He should make himself like a mute. A person who has been guilty in the past of speaking the forbidden should forever bear in mind that it is only through the kindness of Hashem that he has not awakened one morning to find himself a mute. Through such reflection, one will forever feel indebted to Hashem for His unceasing kindness and will surely refrain from forbidden speech

#236

开云体育

SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Study the Laws
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There is another meaning to the description of the art of silence as a craft. One who seeks to become a craftsman must study and train until he has mastered the skills of a given craft. There is no other way to become a true expert at one’s trade.
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With regard to speech, one might be inclined to think: “Why must I study the laws of shmiras haloshon in all their fine details? I will simply train myself to avoid conversation. That way, I will surely not transgress!’’ This is a mistake, for not always is silence desirable. In fact, there are even times when the halachah requires that one relate negative information about a given individual! Therefore, one must study and know well the laws of speech in all their details, so that he will truly master the art of silence.
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The Sages were very exacting in stating, “Which craft should man pursue in this world?’’ For one might mistakenly think: “It has been my way for many years to be careful in avoiding forbidden speech. I have more experience in this ‘craft’ than a real craftsman has in his particular expertise! Shmiras haloshon is by now second nature to me; there is no longer any need for vigilance.’’
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To preclude this false notion, the Sages state: “Which craft should man pursue in this world?’’ to indicate that all man’s days in this world he must be alert to the pitfalls of forbidden speech.

#238

开云体育

SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Best of All
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Shimon his [Rabban Gamliel’s] son says: “All my days I have been raised among the Sages and I found nothing better for oneself than silence” (Avos?1:17).
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R’ Shimon is, in effect, saying: “I was reared among the Sages and had the opportunity to glean from all their precious, sacred qualities. And of all those qualities, the art of silence is most outstanding.’’
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Alternatively, R’ Shimon may have meant the following: The Sages were the wisest of men and surely did not engage in pointless conversation. Nevertheless, there was nothing, aside from speaking words of Torah, which they found more beneficial to themselves than silence.
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R’ Shimon was precise in saying: “and I found nothing better for oneself ...” Man’s corporeal existence in this world makes it virtually impossible for even the purest of souls to ensure that his every utterance is without flaw. This is why silence is so desirable.
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If such was true of the generation of R’ Shimon, whose Sages were accustomed to speaking only words of true wisdom, then what of ourselves, whose minds are preoccupied with matters devoid of substance and meaning? If one’s mouth will not be restrained by the harness of silence, then invariably it will speak in the way that it has been accustomed since one’s youth, and the loss will outweigh the gain many times over.

#239

开云体育

SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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A Matter of Life and Death
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By exercising verbal restraint, one is saved from many sins: loshon hora, flattery, mockery and lying. He is also saved from verbal attack. There are numerous inestimable benefits of developing the quality of silence.
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People confide their private matters to a person who is known to guard his tongue, for he can be trusted to keep such information to himself.
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A wise man once said: “When I hear someone speak evil of me, I remain silent, for I fear that would I respond in kind, I would then hear abuses that are worse than the previous ones.’’ Whenever a person is verbally attacked and responds in kind, the result, invariably, is worse verbal attack.
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“Death and life are in the tongue’s power” (Mishlei?18:21). The tongue can cause harm in a way that the sword cannot. The sword can kill only through direct contact with its victim, while the tongue can bring about the ruination of someone who is miles away. Man was created with two eyes, two ears, two nostrils, but only one mouth, to indicate that he is obligated to limit his speech, for transgression through speech can occur quite easily, and with far-reaching consequences.

#240

开云体育

SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Protective Fence
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“The best medicine of all is silence” (Megillah 18a). “A protective fence for wisdom is silence” (Avos?3:17). Silence is good for the wise, and surely for the unwise. One should guard his tongue like the apple of his eye, for one’s mouth can be the source of his ruination and the movements of his lips can endanger his soul. Thus it is written, “One who guards his mouth and tongue guards his soul from tribulations” (Mishlei?21:23).
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Better to be told, “Speak! Why are you so quiet?’’ than for others to find one’s prattling burdensome and ask that he be silent.
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Scripture states: “From that which lies within your bosom [i.e. your soul], guard the portals of your mouth” (Michah 7:5). The use of the term portals in reference to the mouth is instructive. An entrance to a house must be opened when necessary, but it cannot be left open all day and all night; to do so would mean to leave the house open to thieves. Similarly, one cannot allow his mouth to be open indiscriminately.
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A person’s most prized possessions are usually kept in a special vault, hidden away in an inner room and carefully guarded. As man’s most prized function, the power of speech must be guarded with great care, and its greatest protection is the quality of silence.

Keep reading Day 91, the lesson for Shabbos

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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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The Need To Talk
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People who find themselves inclined towards melancholy feel a need to speak freely to others and are, understandably, afraid to focus themselves on developing the quality of silence. Should this be the case, one should at least accustom himself to not speak about others, whoever they might be; his friendly conversations should focus on matters of interest, and not on people of interest. When he does find it necessary to discuss others, he should be as brief as possible.
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I have heard it said regarding the great Torah genius, Rabbi Raphael of Hamburg, that he resigned his post as rabbi four years prior to his passing. From that time and on, he would ask of those who visited him that as long as they were within the confines of his home, they should not speak about other people. I have also heard regarding another leader of his generation that he was exceedingly careful never to discuss others.1
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Certainly one must be careful not to discuss a storekeeper with his competitor, nor a craftsman with other members of his craft. Such conversations often lead to loshon hora, especially when the storekeepers or craftsmen are known to bear ill will toward one another.
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This restriction applies not only to singing the storekeeper’s praises, regarding which our Sages warned: “One should never speak the praises of his fellow [excessively], for praise will inevitably lead to criticism” (Arachin 16a).2 One should refrain entirely from discussing an individual with that person’s competitor, for the listener will quite possibly steer the conversation in a direction that will allow him to vent his negative feelings. If one finds it absolutely necessary to engage in such discussion for some constructive purpose, he should keep the conversation as brief as possible; otherwise, it will inevitably lead to loshon hora.
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1. Toward the end of his life, the Chofetz Chaim was visited by someone who broached the subject of a dispute in his home town. The Chofetz Chaim interrupted him, “For years, I have avoided the sin of loshon hora. Do you wish that I now be caught in its web?’’
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2. When one praises another excessively, it is inevitable that the speaker or someone else present will point out one or more of the subject’s faults (Rashi ad loc.). See Sefer Chofetz Chaim Part I, ch. 9.
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