HI,
Here is a picture of my Nano a Nano ISP programming setup. I used the ISP headers with the pins connected one to one, except for the orange wire connected to pin 10 on the Nano programmed as an ISP to reset on the Nano being programmed.
The ISP header pins are connected internally to pins 11, 12, and 13. Because the Nano on my uBITX does not have the ISP header installed, I described the actual pins used rather than the ISP header pins. The brown wire from reset on the ISP programmer Nano to +5V is the (use with caution) direct short disable reset fix.
Be advised on some boards (Uno vs Nano) pin 1 of the ISP header is rotated by 180 degrees. So double check if you use the ISP headers.?

Tom, wb6b