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"Caroline Liebau" <Caroline_Liebau@...> wrote in part:

What do you think of this one

Well . . . since you asked for folks input <wink> . . .

My niece made a beautiful scripture
quilt for her new daughter-in-law's mother.

WOW, that sounds exceptional! Labor of love does not begin to describe
something like that.

well used. This week she got a call from the lady, asking if she
would mind if the quilt was put in the coffin of her sister's
mother- in-law!!! The deceased lady often complained of being cold.
My poor niece was struck speechless. Now, that's REALLY "putting
something away"

I sure is, LOL (really putting something away).

I can understand several sides of this. That beautiful quilt took
many hours of labor and love, so it would be natural for it's creator
to balk at the idea of it being buried with someone (presuming that's
what you intended when you said she was speechless).

But . . . *on the other hand*, think about it . . . A) the person whom
she gave it to, did have the courtesy to call, this shows respect for
your nieces feelings, which is not to be discounted and B) yes, I know
it could be a " but, but, but . . . you want to do what with that
quilt I made?" moment . . . yet depending on one's perspective on the
matter one could think, wow . . . what an honor that they would want
to put *my scripture quilt* on someone to symbolicly keep them warm
forever, especially for someone who was always cold, the concept is an
act of love and respect for the person who has crossed, even it is
only their earthly body. It is, in a way, being put to use 24/7.

I myself have thyroid disease, oftentimes I find it hard to keep warm,
especially my extremities, as a consequence, I have favorite
*blankies*, some are after all, better than others . . . this makes
them a source of basic human comfort, so . . . we get attached to
these things. I have one I sleep with every night because it is not
only super soft, but very warm.

If your niece is struggling with the decision to be made or already
made, perhaps having another perspective might help.

Gentle Hugz,
Charlotte in NV/Celticharper1
~ Embroidery Designs

Thanks, Charlotte, for your perspective on the quilt situation. My
niece decided, (after regaining her voice) that what you present as
a gift is indeed a gift to that person, to do with as they please.
And you are right, the person had the courtesy to call her. I was
proud of Nancy for keeping her head about it, even though she was
hurt.

However, when the lady arrived at the funeral home intending to put
the quilt in the coffin, her own sisters prevented her from doing
so. Two of them were quilters, and knew the value of the quilt in
question. They found another alternative coverlet.

Sorry for this rather grim topic, but it does illustrate a life
lesson. What you give away, you give away.

Another example: my sister-in-law made a kingsize white "whole
cloth" quilt, entirely handstitched for her son's 25th anniversary.
She worked on it three years. That summer, she saw it being used on
the beach as a beach blanket, with kids and dogs running over it.
Again, nothing was said. A gift is a gift. This could mean that the
next quilt for them will be a tied quilt, LOL.
Hugs,
Caroline

"Caroline Liebau" <Caroline_Liebau@...> wrote:

Thanks, Charlotte, for your perspective on the quilt situation.

You're welcome =-)

I was proud of Nancy for keeping her head about it

Yes, it speaks VERY well of her.

even though she was hurt.

I understand. I know that there have been times, I have put a lot of
thought into something, and the person didn't receieve it as I thought
they would, you know the handmade thing . . . no matter how well it
comes out, it seems to lack value if one didn't spend big bucks on it,
as if our time isn't valuable. I do understand, all too well.

However, when the lady arrived at the funeral home intending to put
the quilt in the coffin, her own sisters prevented her from doing
so. Two of them were quilters, and knew the value of the quilt in
question. They found another alternative coverlet.

Ahhhh, intervention! LOL.

Sorry for this rather grim topic,

Not at all. I am a volunteer counselor (not a pro) for some grim and
hairy stuff sometimes, so it all still touches me (I still feel for
others deeply).

but it does illustrate a life
lesson. What you give away, you give away.

Very true.

Another example: my sister-in-law made a kingsize white "whole
cloth" quilt, entirely handstitched for her son's 25th anniversary.
She worked on it three years. That summer, she saw it being used on
the beach as a beach blanket,

I literally gasped at the concept of that. You know <sigh> sometimes
others just have NO clue of the time and effort that is put into these
items, I *like* to think it's because they've never done/created it? I
know, this is putting it kindly . . . they should *think* about what
they are doing, and I have my feisty moments, I probably would have
said something, LOL.

Again, nothing was said. A gift is a gift. This could mean that the
next quilt for them will be a tied quilt, LOL.

Something with far less effort, given with the comment, "I noticed you
like to go to the beach, this blanket is comfortable but suitable for
such" <-HINT<HINT<HINT . . . LOL.

Hugz,
Charlotte in NV/Celticharper1
~ Embroidery Designs

Dear Ladies - what all this discussion reminds me of is how much women's
traditional work is dismissed and devalued. It is if our time (and us) and
work and creations have no value at all. That is why it is so exciting to
see quilt museums or women's art shows at state fairs - at least someone
recognizes the value, beauty and skill (and time) put into these created
objects of beauty. But because embroidery and quilting are traditionally
thought of as women's "pastimes" much like home sewing, they have no value
in the outer world.

I've had a friend brag to me she found a handmade quilt at WalMart or Target
for $50 and proudly put this shabby poorly made quilt on her bed. Talk
about devalued women and children who put these together for next to nothing
in China, but they have value in people's eyes because some discount store
sells them. My own granddaughter, the oldest at 21, was talking about an
Amish quilt shop she went into and those quilts were sooo expensive, some
were over $100! I looked at her and said, honey, I've made you several
quilts, and I don't think any of them had less that $80 worth of fabric and
thread in them. Those Amish quilts should be selling for $800 and up so the
women could make $10 per hour pre-tax and recover their fabric and batting
costs. Her mouth dropped.

I also had to educate my favorite nephew/son on this topic when he asked for
quilts for his children. I would have made them anyways, but when I
explained the time, skill, and money that goes into making one he gained a
whole new respect for "women's work". Good!

The idea of someone's hand-stitched wholecloth quilt being used as a beach
blanket makes my skin crawl. Don't think I'd be making anything more for
them - next Christmas (and every Christmas thereafter) they might get a
beach towel or two from Walmart! :) Save your time, work and money for
people who know the value of what they are receiving.

KathyS

--- In HookedOnEmbroidery@..., Charlotte/Charlie/Lady
Teàrlag <tearlag@...> wrote:

Ah, Charlotte, You must be a quilter!!! People who do not quilt
often see imported quilts selling in discount stores for $29.95.
made in China or elsewhere by cottage laborers. They have no idea
that premium quilting cotton can cost upwards of $8-14 per yard, and
that a standard queen sized quilt can be worth over $500 in
materials alone, to say nothing of the hand labor involved. If this
quilt had been made FOR the deceased, and loved and used BY the
deceased, it would be a different story in my humble opinion. But
the quilt was made for another person who wanted to give it away in
less than a month. My niece reacted far better than I would have,
LOL.
Now, to make this a more
positive post, I will mention one of my favorite things-
"Grandma, you made THIS for ME??? The sweetest words on the
planet...
Hugs, Caroline

"Caroline Liebau" <Caroline_Liebau@...> wrote in part:

Ah, Charlotte, You must be a quilter!!!

No, not yet, I just grew up with a lot of this stuff with my grandma,
she taught me from very early on, to appreciate such things.

I LOVE crazy quilts, as randomly put together as possible, LOL (crazy
crazy quilts?) LOL.

But
the quilt was made for another person who wanted to give it away in
less than a month.

Wow, that definately sheds a different light on the matter.

My niece reacted far better than I would have,

I think she handled it really well, at least someone intervened, LOL.

positive post, I will mention one of my favorite things-
"Grandma, you made THIS for ME???

LOL, that is so cute =-)

=-)
Charlotte in NV/Celticharper1
~ Embroidery Designs

a lot of people have no idea what it takes to make a quilt. "It didn't
cost you anything because they are made from scraps." That statement just
fries me. Maybe they were 50 years or more ago but not anymore. I can't
believe anyone is that obtuse! They have no idea quilting fabric is $8-$10
a yard or that it takes months sometimes to make a quilt. You can buy a
'quilt' any size for $20-$40 at the discount places so they have not idea of
the quality difference in a 'real' quilt. If you send a quilt out for
quilting plus the fabrics and batting you purchased to make it, you can have
over $500, some
times a lot more, just in that, not counting the time it took you to piece
it.

an older guy came in to the LQS one cay and wanted a quilt made for his
wife. He offered to pay $25 for it!!!

I did a hand needleturn Jacobean appliqu quilt on a black background and
let me tell you it was a lot of work! Took several years as I only worked
on it on Thursday afternoons. It was a great quilt when it was done but
when my sister's business partner got done long arm quilting it, it is
FANTASTIC. I told them to make the quilt sing and it is truly Grand Opera
now. I will be keeping that unless someone comes up with some big bucks
for it.<ggg> It is entered in Paducah. Hope it gets chosen for judging.

I'll get off the soap box. (LOL)

Karol

LOL I went into the local quilt shop in Mena Arkansas this past month to look at some of the FINE artwork done on them. I fell in love with a wedding ring type quilt, ALL hand quilted by local mormons and WOW were they nice :)
The lowest price in the shop was 1600.00 for hand sewn quilts, and they go FAST there too. I have not seen one stay longer then a month in their shop :)

Connie took over two months on her first quilt (learning experience) and wow was it nice when it was finished. we also took it to be longarmed when the top was finished, and it still cost us over 450.00 to do it ourselves.

I think a lot of people will go WOW to the prices of "real quilts" but the quality is much better. My mother made me a quilt when I was 14, now my oldest son has it, and believe it or not its still useable with OVER 300 washings in the past (***) years. (not giving up my age LOL)

Bart


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Don't I wish. Quilting fabric up here runs 15 to 20 a yard
Sewing hugs Doreen........... jandor@... Email for pricing
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moderator/list Mom

I still have some that my mom made from scraps too. All the fabric left
over from the clothes we sewed for ourselves went into them. She also used
factory cut aways that an aunt got for her in the CA garment district (many
years ago now)
Karol