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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 98 – Pertinent Information????
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The prohibition, “Do not accept a false report” (see Day 91), teaches us that loshon hora should not be listened to and must not be accepted. However, when the information being conveyed is important to know for constructive reasons,
it merits one’s attention and may be listened to. Just as relating negative information l’toeles, for a constructive purpose, is not considered speaking loshon hora, so too is listening for a constructive purpose considered responsible and proper.
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Information that one may listen to includes anything that might help to prevent or correct undue harm to any individual, be it the listener, the speaker, the person spoken about, or another party. It would also include information that could help prevent or
correct damage that is physical, financial, emotional or spiritual.
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It is correct to listen to a person’s claim against someone else if one thinks that he can be of help in rectifying the situation, or if the listener or someone else might be vulnerable to similar treatment by the person being spoken about. It is permissible
to listen to information about a person with whom one is planning to collaborate in a joint venture, if the information is pertinent to that relationship. In all of the above instances, the information is being listened to for a constructive purpose, and hence
is not considered loshon hora.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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The Day of Judgment
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The way in which an individual tends to judge others can well determine his own status as a tzaddik (righteous person) or rasha (wicked person) for all eternity.
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The Sages teach that whether or not an individual is deemed meritorious is determined by weighing the sum of his merits against his sins. The Sages further state regarding the great Day of Judgment at the time of the Resurrection of the Dead: Three Books will
be opened — one for the completely righteous; one for the completely wicked; and one for those in between. The completely righteous will immediately be inscribed for eternal life; the completely wicked will immediately be inscribed for Gehinnom; and those
in between will descend to Gehinnom and [after enduring a period of retribution] will then ascend (Rosh Hashanah 16b).
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If Hashem will judge an individual by the measure of strict justice, then even if that individual had performed countless good deeds through the course of his lifetime, he will nevertheless be left with very few merits by the time his judgment has ended. Many
of his deeds will have been found lacking in proper detail or method, while those whose performance was wholesome might not have been accompanied by proper love of God, awe of Him, or were devoid of the joy with which a mitzvah should be performed. Thus, most
good deeds will be found blemished in some way. The individual’s remaining good deeds will be far outweighed by his sins, and thus he will be deemed a rasha for eternity.
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How to avoid the winter weight gain
Weight gain isn’t good for health and also means that, comes springtime, we’ll have more work to do to shed the extra pounds.
Why do people gain weight in the winter?
What is the average weight gain over the winter?
How can I talk myself into exercising when it’s so cold?
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Please Do NOT make a New Years' resolution.
Below is an estimate of how many people who make New Year resolutions keep them, according to insideoutmastery.com??
9% successfully keep their New Year’s resolutions. 23% of people quit by the end of the first week, 64% after the first month (according to a study with Australian and UK citizens), and 81% before the end of the second year. Most people quit on the second Friday of the month, according to Strava, a Running and Cycling tracking app. They named this day “Quitters Day.” 43% of people expect to give up on their goals by February, which explains the relatively high quitting rate in January.
If you want to make a permanent change, there is a method, but New Year's resolutions are not the way.?? Small and consistent changes in habits are the only way to see real change and motivate yourself to take on more challenges.? There is hope in making real change and living the life you want to live, but New Year's resolutions often cause more harm to one's motivations than good. If you are ready to make a move in the right direction, call us at the , and we can show you how. ?May 2023 bring joy, positivity, and success to you and your loved ones.?
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Register Today: Khan al-Ahmar, Sovereignty Tour on Wed. January 11
Sovereignty On the Way
Sovereignty & Governance Throughout the Land?
The Next Sovereignty Tour is Wednesday, January 11th?to Khan al-Ahmar With Meir Deutsch, of Regavim!
Dear Friends,
Please Note the new date for the Next Sovereignty Tour is?on?Wednesday, January 11th to Khan al-Ahmar With Meir Deutsch, of Regavim! The tour is in Hebrew.??
We suggest you register today because places are limited.?
Meet at 8:45 am at the Inbal Hotel. Back around 4:00 pm.?See our flyers attached?or go to??
Khan al-Ahmar – How long will the injustice remain?
Wednesday, the 18th of Tevet, January 11th, 2023
Led by Meir Deutsch – CEO of Regavim
9:00 Leaving the Inbal Hotel
9:30 Har Hatsofim Overlook
10:10 Kikar Adam – The Fayyad Plan + the schools
10:40 Kochav Hashahar – The pollution crosses the borders
11:15 Binyamin Regional Council – A meeting with the Council Head
12:05 Break for lunch – Center
13:00 Arrival at Cna’anit and changing to off-road vehicles
13:30 Khan al-Ahmar
14:00 Traveling to Ma’ale Adumim
14:20 Ma’ale Adumim overlook
15:45 Approximate estimate for return to Inbal Hotel
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Please bring food, drinks, a hat, and walking shoes
For details: Yehudit Katsover 050-7161818 ? Nadia Matar 050-5500834
Cost: ? 150 ? To Register: Renee 054-7103240 ? email: ribonut@...
Since there is a lot of interest in this Tiyul, in order to reserve your place please register & pay online at:??and please send a WhatsApp to Renee at 054-7103240?or an Email to ribonut@... with your full name, cellphone # & email address. Cost: 150 NIS. Each person should bring their own food and drinks for the day. More details will be posted soon. The tour is in Hebrew.Cancellations less than 72 hours before departure will be charged in full.The Sovereignty tour is limited to the first 50 registrants. The tour is in Hebrew.??
Looking forward to seeing you,
Yehudit Katsover and Nadia Matar
The Sovereignty Movement
?Please visit our website at?
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 96 – Whom to Rebuke
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In situations where reproof is required (see Day 93), one is obligated to interrupt even his own parent who is speaking loshon hora and respectfully explain that he or she should not be speaking in this manner.? A rav, as well,
should not be allowed to speak loshon hora.? However, it is disrespectful to accuse a rav of speaking loshon hora.? Instead, one should ask the rav for assistance in understanding why it was permissible for him to make a given statement.
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Children are not included in our obligation to reprove a fellow Jew who has sinned.? However, parents, as well as teachers, are obligated in the mitzvah of chinuch, educating their charges in proper mitzvah observance.? Thus, parents and teachers must train
children from an early age to refrain from speaking or listening to loshon hora.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Judge Others Favorably
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The Torah states:”With righteousness shall you judge your fellow” (Vayikra 19:15), which our Sages interpret as a commandment to give one’s fellow the benefit of the doubt (Shevuos 30a). This precept is among those “whose fruit one enjoys in this world and
whose principal reward is preserved for the World to Come” (Shabbos 127a). Development of this trait is crucial for perfecting the quality of Shmiras haloshon.
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To give one’s fellow the benefit of the doubt is to decide in one’s mind that someone who is said to have committed a misdeed did so either unwillfully, out of ignorance, or correctly (i.e. that, in fact, a
sin has not been committed). When the report does not lend itself to any of the above interpretations, one should consider the possibility that the speaker added or omitted details which completely alter the nature of the report.
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To judge others favorably is also to bear in mind the teaching: ”Do not judge your fellow until you have reached his place” (Avos 2:5).
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The more one accustoms himself to judge others favorably, the less he will transgress the sin of loshon hora.
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Keep reading Day 97, the lesson for Shabbos
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 97 – Whom not to rebuke?????
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The obligation to reprove one’s fellow Jew does not apply to a non-observant Jew who is in the category of a mumar (one who is aware of halachic requirements and ignores them – see Day 14). However, a non-observant Jew who sins
out ignorance must be instructed gently regarding loshon hora. The beauty of shmiras halashon can be appreciated even by those whose observance level is minimal, and should be shared with them at the earliest opportunity.
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Nevertheless, one does not rebuke a non-observant person with whom he does not have a relationship. It is obvious that such reproof will not convince the person to refrain from speaking loshon hora in the future, and will only serve to anger him. This would
be similar to the situation (in Day 93) where reproof would cause worse sin to occur and is therefore inappropriate.
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This rule holds true for an observant Jew as well. It is wrong to offer rebuke to someone with whom one has no real relationship, if it is clear that he will not change his ways and that he be offended by the person’s meddling in his affairs.
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Rebuke in such a case would cause hatred and, possibly, even more loshon hora.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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A Classic Illustration
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The following incident, recorded in the Talmud (Shabbos 127b), illustrates the extent to which a Jew must judge his fellow favorably:
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A man from Israel’s Upper Galilee hired himself out for three years to someone living in the southern portion of the Land. At the end of the three years, on the eve of Yom Kippur, the worker requested his wages so that he could return home and feed his family.
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His employer responded,”I have no money.’’
”Then pay me with fruit,’’ said the worker.
”I have none,’’ came the reply.
”Pay me with land.’’
”I have none.’’
”Pay me with livestock.’’
”I have none.’’
”Pay me with pillows and blankets.’’
”I have none.’’
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The worker slung his pack over his shoulder and headed home, bitterly disappointed.
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At the conclusion of Succos, the employer appeared at his worker’s door, with money in hand, along with three donkeys, bearing food, drink and delicacies. The food was brought inside and the two enjoyed a hearty meal together. Afterwards, the employer paid
the worker in full.
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The employer then asked, ”When you asked for your earnings and I replied that I had no money, what did you think?’’
The worker replied,”I thought that perhaps a deal that you could not pass up had come along and you had used all your cash for that.’’
”And when I said that I had no land?’’
”I thought that perhaps all your land had been leased to others.’’
”And when I said that I had no fruit?’’
”I thought that perhaps your fruits had not yet been tithed.’’
?‘‘And when I said that I had no pillows or blankets?’’
‘‘I thought that perhaps you had dedicated all your possessions to the Temple.’’
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The employer exclaimed, ‘‘I make an oath that that is exactly what happened! ...Just as you judged me favorably, so too should the Omnipresent judge you favorably.’’
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And indeed, the Sages teach, ‘‘One who judges his fellow favorably is judged favorably [by Heaven]’’ (ibid.).
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Reminder: Chaya Legumsky shiur Sunday at 9 PM Israel time"
BS"D
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Today's Inspiration - Shavua tov!
The Blanket
Said the Riziner: “Various types of people come to me, but not all are influenced by my counsel to improve themselves. If a man is covered by a blanket, his inner warmth is increased. But if a stone is covered this way, it receives no warmth.”
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Source: Beth Pinchas
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
Day 95 – Proper Reaction
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Based on the previous rules, it is clear that upon hearing loshon hora, one should promptly interrupt the speaker and reprimand him for his words. In a case where doing so would cause the speaker embarrassment (i.e. others are present),
it is preferable that one tactfully change the subject, thus preventing the further speaking of loshon hora, and offer reproof later (in private).
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If one finds himself unable to change the subject, he should walk away. While incapable of fulfilling his obligation to reprove, one must, nevertheless, avoid transgressing the sin of listening to loshon hora. If one feels uncomfortable leaving, the least he
should do is try his best to ignore what is being said, and use facial expressions to show disapproval. Certainly, he should not appear as though he is enjoying the conversation.
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One must train himself to defend his values, to be more concerned with truth than with his personal pride. Ultimately, one will find that the less he fears scorn and derision of scoffers, the more his self esteem will grow and his stature will grow in the eyes
of others as well.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Silencing the Gossipmongers
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It is a proven fact that to restrain oneself from speaking and listening to loshon hora is difficult for only the first few weeks. As others come to realize that an individual will not speak or listen to loshon hora, mockery or other forbidden speech, they
will refrain from relating such talk to him, and will peddle their ”wares” elsewhere. They will come to understand that such talk does not raise their esteem in this man’s eyes; to the contrary, he considers them nothing more than gossipmongers and scorners.
He will hardly have to guard himself from hearing loshon hora, for the gossipmongers themselves will avoid telling their stories in his presence, lest he belittle their words before others who are present.
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What is needed is an initial firm resolve to acquire this sacred quality. Regarding such spiritual striving do our Sages say, ”One who reflects upon his ways in this world merits and sees salvation from the Holy One, Blessed is He” (Moed Katan 5a).
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Today's Inspiration - Shabbat shalom!
Self-Analysis
Said the Gerer Rabbi: “Every Jew possesses some good trait pleasing unto the Lord, but no one of us is able to diagnose himself adequately to discover which trait it is. You may be sure that the qualities which bring you self-satisfaction are not those which the Lord approves of in you.”
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Source: Siach Sarfei Kodesh
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?SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 94 – Group Reproof
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We have seen that one must reprove the speaker of loshon hora even if it is highly unlikely that the reproof will be effective.
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When several people are involved in a discussion that includes loshon hora, one must speak up and caution them that what they are discussing is forbidden. However, unlike the case of an individual who speaks loshon hora, if the people ignore reproof, one should
not persist in his rebuke unless he feels that his words might ultimately achieve a positive result. In an unreceptive group setting, it is wise to refrain from excessive reproof.
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An exception to this rule is when one finds himself in a community where the prohibition of loshon hora has long been disregarded. Widespread disregard calls for more than ordinary reproof. It demands persistent protest, calling for an awareness of the severity
of speaking loshon hora, and knowledge of what constitutes loshson hora.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Step-by-Step
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One who seeks to attain the quality of shmiras haloshon should use the very opposite approach of the gossiper. The gossiper makes it his habit to sit among groups involved in conversation, in the hope that he will hear some bit of information that he can ridicule
or spread to others. The gossiper is forever in search of ”the latest news” in his town, so that he will have no lack of material to relate all day and night.
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The quality of shmiras haloshon should be attained gradually. The first step is to accustom oneself to avoid groups involved in idle conversation and to train oneself not to inquire about the latest gossip. One should train himself, little by little, until
he reaches the point where he does not even want to be informed of any gossip. With the passage of time, Hashem will help him so that shmiras haloshon will become a part of his very nature. He will find it incredible that others can transgress the sin of speaking
loshon hora, which to him has become something repulsive, like anything else which the Torah prohibits.
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INFO: Where can I buy a Laptop Online or in Jerusalem?
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Be Satisfied with What You Have
Rabbi Shlomo Ibn Gvriol said: "The one who is satisfied with what he has is richer than everyone else in the world even though they might have more, but are not satisfied with what they have. Keep your focus on what you have and not on what someone else has."
Source: Mivchar Peninim
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Catch Rav Zev Leff on Zoom tonight, or by phone
Rav?Leff's weekly Wednesday night shiur is now being broadcast live from his living?room at his home in Moshav Matityahu, at?8:50 p.m.?tonight.?
The shiur has two parts. The first part is about the halachos between Man and his fellow. The second part is Ramchal's classic work,?Derech Hashem.
People can join from just about anywhere in the world, by?Zoom?or by?phone, so let your friends and family in Israel and Chu"l know.? It's the same link every week, so you can save this email for the future.
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Meeting ID: 634 639 6447 Passcode: 613 One tap mobile +97239786688,,6346396447# Israel +97223764509,,6346396447# Israel
Dial by your location ? ? ? ? +972 3 978 6688 Israel ? ? ? ? +972 2 376 4509 Israel ? ? ? ? +972 2 376 4510 Israel ? ? ? ? +1 301 715 8592 US (Washington DC) ? ? ? ? +1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago) ? ? ? ? +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)? ? ? ? ? +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose) ? ? ? ? +1 929 205 6099 US (New York)? ? ? ? ? +44 203 481 5237 United Kingdom? Meeting ID: 634 639 6447 Find your local number:? ? Please mute yourself once you're in the shiur.?
The shiur is recorded. For recordings contact raaronk@...
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Alan Fitness
PRD