Lesson 34. I could see peace instead of this.
The idea for today begins to describe the conditions that prevail in the other
way of seeing. Peace of mind is clearly an internal matter. It must begin with
your own thoughts, and then extend outward. It is from your peace of mind that a
peaceful perception of the world arises.
Three longer practice periods are required for today's exercises. One in the
morning and one in the evening are advised, with an additional one to be
undertaken at any time in between that seems most conducive to readiness. All
applications should be done with your eyes closed. It is your inner world to
which the applications of today's idea should be made.
Some five minutes of mind searching are required for each of the longer practice
periods. Search your mind for fear thoughts, anxiety-provoking situations,
"offending" personalities or events, or anything else about which you are
harboring unloving thoughts. Note them all casually, repeating the idea for
today slowly as you watch them arise in your mind, and let each one go, to be
replaced by the next.
If you begin to experience difficulty in thinking of specific subjects, continue
to repeat the idea to yourself in an unhurried manner, without applying it to
anything in particular. Be sure, however, not to make any specific exclusions.
The shorter applications are to be frequent, and made whenever you feel your
peace of mind is threatened in any way. The purpose is to protect yourself from
temptation throughout the day. If a specific form of temptation arises in your
awareness, the exercise should take this form:
<I could see peace in this situation instead of what I now see in it.>
If the inroads on your peace of mind take the form of more generalized adverse
emotions, such as depression, anxiety or worry, use the idea in its original
form. If you find you need more than one application of today's idea to help you
change your mind in any specific context, try to take several minutes and devote
them to repeating the idea until you feel some sense of relief. It will help you
if you tell yourself specifically:
<I can replace my feelings of depression, anxiety or worry [or my thoughts
about this situation, personality or event] with peace.>
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The commentary on this lesson (below) is from Kenneth Wapnick's eight volume
series of books, called: "Journey Through the Workbook of A Course in Miracles,"
which can be purchased at the following site:??~ M. Street
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lesson 34. "I could see peace instead of this."
(1:1-3) "The idea for today begins to describe the conditions that prevail in
the other way of seeing. Peace of mind is clearly an internal matter. It must
begin with your own thoughts, and then extend outward."
*Peace of mind is an "internal matter." The problem is that most of the time we
think it results from the outer world meeting our needs. However, Jesus teaches
that peace has nothing to do with the external. The implications of this fact,
once again, <must> evoke anxiety, because he is informing us that nothing
outside can either hurt us or give us peace -- the outer world does not
threaten, victimize, or please us --<there is nothing outside us!> The challenge
lies in allowing ourselves to become increasingly aware of this <without>
lapsing into denial. What helps <not> to fall into this ego trap is recognizing
that the practical implications of this thought are that even though we may
experience anxiety we attribute to external causes, we can still go within to
the Teacher of truth, Who gently reminds us that peace is a choice <we> can make
(and therefore experience), independent of outer circumstances. I remember when
I first did this lesson I substituted <Jesus> for <peace.> In other words, when
tempted to make some aspect of the error real, I would choose Jesus as my
teacher and remember to smile at the silliness of believing there could ever be
anything in my mind but his love.*
(1:4) "It is from your peace of mind that a peaceful perception of the world
arises."
*This is all that is important, and all A Course in Miracles addresses: that we
perceive the world peacefully. Jesus is not pleading for peace in the world,
because there is no objective world outside our minds. To ask for external peace
is to have first made conflict real -- <out there>. Again, there is no world
apart from the way we perceive it. What matters to me as a student of this
course is correcting how I perceive, which I do by correcting how I think. This
is accomplished by correcting my mistaken choice of teachers -- always the
bottom line. In this lesson, therefore, instead of saying "I could see peace
instead of this," you could say, as I said above, "I could see Jesus instead of
this." That would highlight even more the personal nature of his teaching.*
(2) "Three longer practice periods are required for today's exercises. One in
the morning and one in the evening are advised, with an additional one to be
undertaken at any time in between that seems most conducive to readiness. All
applications should be done with your eyes closed. It is your inner world to
which the applications of today's idea should be made."
*We are thus urged to practice with our eyes closed, as Jesus focuses attention
on our thoughts -- the <internal matter> of being at peace. This is the
prerequisite for what follows: emphasizing the process of searching your mind, a
theme, as we have said that is central to A Course in Miracles. As you process
this material, the fear level can get so high you would be tempted to cover your
ego thoughts and think you do not have to deal with them because --
misappropriately citing some of the Course's metaphysical ideas such as you are
holy and loved by God: moreover, nothing has happened and you are not even here
-- you believe that to do so would be making the illusion real. Just as in many
other places, Jesus urges us here to search our minds for ego thoughts. If you
think you do not have any, A Course in Miracles is perfect for you as it teaches
that you <do> have these thoughts. Indeed, you could not be here if you did not
have them. The idea is to get in touch with your attack thoughts, either those
directed against yourself or others, as we now see:*
(3:1-2) "Some five minutes of mind searching are required for each of the longer
practice periods. Search your mind for fear thoughts, anxiety-provoking
situations, "offending" personalities or events, or anything else about which
you are harboring unloving thoughts."
*You do not have to scratch too far beneath the surface before confronting one
of these thoughts. It is essential to search them out when you do these lessons.
If you are not aware of them, the idea of "seeing peace instead of this" has no
meaning. I could see peace instead of <what>? If my mind is filled only with
loving thoughts, I certainly do not need this lesson. Therefore, the lesson has
particular meaning when you allow yourself to get in touch with the <unloving>
thoughts, which come from your <unloving> teacher. At this point it does make
sense to say "I could see peace [or Jesus] instead of this." We see reflected
here Jesus' overriding emphasis in his course of looking at the darkness and
bringing it to the light. To cite just one representative passage, the first of
many such citations in this series:
"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all of the
barriers within yourself that you have built against it. It is not necessary to
seek for what is true, but it <is> necessary to seek for what is false."
(T-16.IV.6:1-2)*
(3:3) "Note them all casually, repeating the idea for today slowly as you watch
them arise in your mind, and let each one go, to be replaced by the next."
*To restate this point, you cannot let a thought go if you are not aware that
you have it. Moreover, you cannot let it go unless you have actually chosen
Jesus or the Holy Spirit as your Teacher. If you have not, you are not letting
the thoughts go. Choosing <against> Them means choosing <for> the ego , which
means choosing separation, not to mention guilt, fear, and anxiety that is
inevitable once you have chosen wrongly. To "note them all casually" means not
to make a big deal about them, which is the meaning of looking at your ego with
Jesus. <Not> looking reflects already having made them into a big deal, since if
we had not taken them so seriously we would not have invested these thoughts
with guilt that prevents us from looking.
Jesus' kind gentleness is apparent in this next paragraph, even as he urges us
to continue our practice in the face of anxiety and resistance:*
(4) "If you begin to experience difficulty in thinking of specific subjects,
continue to repeat the idea to yourself in an unhurried manner, without applying
it to anything in particular. Be sure, however, not to make any specific
exclusions."
*Slow, steady, and gentle wins the race.
In paragraphs 5 and 6, Jesus again makes the point of applying the lesson
whenever we are distressed, emphasizing the need to allow ourselves to be in
touch with these thoughts:*
(5-6) "The shorter applications are to be frequent, and made whenever you feel
your peace of mind is threatened in any way. The purpose is to protect yourself
from temptation throughout the day. If a specific form of temptation arises in
your awareness, the exercise should take this form:
I could see peace in this situation instead of what I now see in it.
If the inroads on your peace of mind take the form of more generalized adverse
emotions, such as depression, anxiety or worry, use the idea in its original
form. If you find you need more than one application of today's idea to help you
change your mind in any specific context, try to take several minutes and devote
them to repeating the idea until you feel some sense of relief. It will help you
if you tell yourself specifically:
I can replace my feelings of depression, anxiety or worry [or my thoughts
about this situation, personality or event] with peace."
*Therefore, to make this essential point again, this lesson -- indeed, <all>
lessons -- will have no meaning to you, and will be of no help unless you first
admit to yourself these thoughts and feelings of depression, anxiety, worry,
attack, etc. It is not that they are bad to have; you are here because you <do>
have them. Thus, Jesus says to us in the text, in the context of our willingness
to choose the holy instant:
"Concentrate only on this [ your willingness ], and be not disturbed that
shadows surround it. That is why you came. If you could come without them you
would not need the holy instant." (T-18.IV.2:4-6).
What is "bad" therefore, is pretending that you do not have them, because then
Jesus <will> be of no help to you and <can> be of no help to you. You must bring
the thoughts to him. That is <our> function, as he reminds us in the text:
"You may wonder why it is so crucial that you look upon your hatred and
realize its full extent. You may also think that it would be easy enough for the
Holy Spirit to show it to you, and to dispel it without the need for you to
raise it to awareness yourself." (T.13.III.1.1-2).
Because of this need to raise our awareness of these hate-filled thoughts, we
require the "frequent applications" Jesus recommends. Discipline and vigilance
are necessary if we are to catch these dark thoughts and bring them to his
healing and forgiving light.
These next lessons begin to show us the wondrous things that lie <beyond> our
ego thoughts: the <other> side when we ask for help in choosing "another way of
looking at the world." You may recall my stating that one of the purposes of the
workbook was to recognize we have a split mind; the <wrong-minded> state of the
ego and the <right-minded> home of the Holy Spirit. Only through such
recognition can we meaningfully use the <decision-making> part of our minds to
make the right choice.*
