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Great (free) Elul shiurim starting tomorrow by Rabbi Dr. Beni Gesundheit – live via Zoom (recordings available too)!
Get yourself spiritually ready for Rosh HaShana
– starting TOMORROW!
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Torah in Motion and
Tefilah.org are pleased to present a series of special Elul shiurim in English:
Musings on the Machzor by Dr Beni Gesundheit. The shiurim will take place via
Zoom on Wednesdays. In this series, we will be exploring various topics
surrounding?tefillah?on?Rosh HaShana.?Join us
as we explore the messages, sources, and models of the prayers we say.
?
The
first shiur will take place this Wednesday, August 11 at 11am
EST/6pm ISRAEL on the topic of “Tefillat Chana?as?Haftara?for?Rosh
HaShana?- a Model for Prayer!"
The shiur is open to the
public - all are welcome!
Link to register:
If you can't make it,
get the recording here next week:
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Upcoming shiurim in the
series:
Wednesday,
August 18:?Alenu?- Source, Structure, Messages and History
Wednesday,
August 25:?Mussaf?of Rosh HaShana: Zichronot, Malchuyot,
Shofarot?- Source, Structure and Messages
Wednesday,
September 1:?U'Netaneh tokef?- Source and?Messages
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About the lecturer: Dr.
Beni Gesundheit is an alumnus of Yeshivat Har Etzion who gives lectures on
Torah content at various colleges and communities around Israel. Dr. Gesundheit
is also a pediatrician in the field of oncology and research, with a PHD in
medical ethics.
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It's Elul!? Time for a Tikkun Revolution!? Imagine 10,000 pinholes of light brought down by the prayers of 200 people.? Please join our revolutionary response to adversaries.? For more information:? Tikkuntoday.com
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Shiur: Elul to Yom Kippur Taking Inventory Before Repentance
Ohr Shalom is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.
Topic: Elul to Yom Kippur Taking Inventory before Repentance
Time: Aug 12, 2021, 17:00 Jerusalem
Join Zoom Meeting
Meeting ID: 821 7540 5111 Passcode: 818675 One tap mobile +972553301762,,82175405111#,,,,*818675# Israel +97239786688,,82175405111#,,,,*818675# Israel
Dial by your location ? ? ? ? +972 55 330 1762 Israel ? ? ? ? +972 3 978 6688 Israel Meeting ID: 821 7540 5111 Passcode: 818675 Attached please find the source sheet Hope many of you will watch the Shiur it will be a special Shiur.
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 146 – Constructive Result
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In day 145, we learned that one may relate rechilus for a constructive purpose only if his intent is pure and unsullied by personal motivation. Indeed, constructive intent is what distinguishes a concerned, responsible individual
from a rachil, a gossipmonger.
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However, proper intent alone is not sufficient to make such talk permissible. Unless there is a reasonable chance that the intended purpose will be accomplished, the speaker – though well-meaning – is guilty of gossipmongering.
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Occasionally, one finds himself advising friends who are victims of physical or emotional abuse, whether in a family, social or work setting. At times, the victim has yet to grasp the severity of his problem, or does not realize who the responsible party is.
Clarifying these matters for the person and advising him how to deal with the other party would appear to be a true act of kindness, a genuine mitzvah.
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In many such situations, however, the victim lacks the courage to defend himself, and will do little or nothing to improve his lot. When dealing with such a person, it is forbidden to show him how someone else is causing him agony, as that would be purposeless
gossip. Sad as it is, one may not make a person better aware of his own situation if he will not make constructive use of such clarification and advice.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Curing the Malady
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The above lends insight to the verse, “One who guards his mouth and tongue, guards his soul from tribulations” (Mishlei 21:23). Why does this verse stress the negative, that through shmiras haloshon one’s soul is saved from retribution? Why does it not mention
the infinite reward of one who avoids forbidden speech as stated in the well-known verse, “Which man desires life, who loves days ... guard your tongue from evil ...’’ (Tehillim 34:13)?
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We may suggest that the first verse alludes to the necessity of guarding one’s tongue at times when he feels that a derogatory remark might be in place and that its being uttered might even be a mitzvah. Scripture warns us that unless we are absolutely certain
that such a remark is called for, we should not express it. Following this approach, we will “guard [our] soul from tribulations;’’ that is, from the Divine retribution that will be forthcoming if in fact the remark is unwarranted. Conversely, a person who
will not exercise restraint in such situations will ultimately suffer punishment, instead of the reward he was anticipating for what he mistakenly considered a mitzvah.
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This concludes our discussion of the primary factors in which speaking loshon hora is rooted: anger, scoffing, arrogance, despair [of abiding by the relevant laws], [considering speech] without rule or regulation, negativity and saying that [a given statement]
is permissible [when, in fact, it is not]. One who has been accustomed to speaking loshon hora and seeks to cure himself of this severe malady should begin the process by searching within himself to discover which of the above-mentioned traits are at the root
of his problem. He should strive to rid himself of these deficiencies little by little and supplant them with traits that nurture interpersonal relationships and discourage negative talk.
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Continue reading Day 147, the lesson for Shabbos
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 147– Weighing the Options
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Condition #6:
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As with loshon hora, one may not relate rechilus for a constructive purpose if this purpose can be accomplished through other means (see Day 46).
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Of course, easiest of all is the direct approach – informing the potential victim of what is being plotted and allowing him to fend for himself. The Torah, however, views this avenue as a last resort. If the option exists, one must protect the victim without
his even suspecting that someone is attempting to harm him. (This option does not apply where it is important for the potential victim to be on guard should the other party attempt to harm him at a later point in time.)???
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Obviously, there is a limit to how much effort one is required to invest in protecting his fellow Jew from harm when the person is fully capable of protecting himself. If, in order to avoid involving the potential victim, one would have to dedicate an unreasonable
amount of time and energy, it would be permissible to inform the person so that he can protect himself.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Retroactive Guilt
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One should ponder the fact that at the moment he speaks loshon hora, the Heavenly angels announce his own sins (Roke’ach, Aggadas Mishlei 11:27).
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Riva (cited by Semak 283) states that if one kills someone who is attempting to commit a capital crime against his fellow (and, as such, should be killed if that is the only way to ensure that the crime will not be committed) and later is guilty of that very
same offense, then retroactively, he is considered as if he had shed innocent blood. As proof, Riva cites the episode of King Yeihu who, in killing the members of King Achav’s household, was fulfilling the Divine will as transmitted through prophecy. Yet because
Yeihu too was guilty of a degree of idol worship — though his infractions did not approach the heinous acts of Achav — he was held responsible for murdering Achav’s household, as it is written, “And I shall bring to account the blood of [Achav who was killed
in] Yizrael upon the house of Yeihu” (Hoshea 1:4).
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The same applies to any sin between man and his fellow. If one rightfully attacks someone physically (to prevent him from committing a crime), or embarrasses him (for his having publicly disgraced Hashem’s Name), or speaks negatively about him (to prevent him
from causing someone else harm), and has committed or later commits that very same offense, then he is considered as if he had acted or spoken against an innocent man. Consequently, he will be subject to Divine retribution as if he had acted or spoken against
a Jew whose service of Hashem is wholesome and beyond reproach. |
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 144 – Accuracy
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Condition #4:
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As with loshon hora, one may not exaggerate rechilus even for a constructive purpose. If a person harmed, or is planning to harm, someone else and the victim must be informed, one may not give him an exaggerated account of what has transpired or is about to
occur. This applies even if the person being warned does not take the danger of the situation seriously.
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Furthermore, one may relate only as much information as necessary for the purpose to be accomplished. To relate any additional information would be a transgression of the prohibition of rechilus.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Sensitivity in Speech
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Even if one has become so accustomed to speaking loshon hora and so overcome by his evil inclination that forbidden talk pours from his lips without his even realizing what he is saying, nevertheless, he should not despair. Through proper study and review of
the relevant laws, a dramatic change for the better will occur. His very nature will change, and he will find himself carefully weighing his own words as he speaks. Even if he will speak but avak loshon hora (words which can lead to loshon hara) he will take
note of it, and will be careful not to repeat his mistake.
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Hashem has endowed man with sensitivity, especially with regard to matters of personal speech. This ability is a great asset in the study of Torah, for when a student enunciates his thoughts, he can better perceive whether or not they are correct. As the Sages
state, “For they [words of Torah] are life to those who express them with their mouths” (Eruvin 54a). This ability to discern is true regarding other areas of speech as well.
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However, such sensitivity is exceedingly weakened through habitual involvement in idle conversation and according little thought to what one is saying. However, when one studies the laws of proper speech and, as a result, becomes cognizant of his own verbal
expression, this sensitivity returns little by little, until it attains its original strength
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 142 – Real or Fantasy
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What may appear to be a plot-in-the-making, which should be exposed before it materializes, may sometimes be nothing more than meaningless talk. If one overhears others plotting to harm someone, he may not inform the potential victim
unless there is sound basis for assuming that the plotters are serious.
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Occasionally, people deal with anger and frustration by fantasizing, plotting and threatening with no real intent of translating their words into action. In such situations, the well-meaning bystander who conveys information is guilt of speaking loshon hora,
rechilus and hotzaas shem ra (slander).
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Sin Breeds Sin
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As mentioned above, the way to rid oneself of negativity is to ponder its ill effects:
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Such an attitude makes it impossible to fulfill the commandment “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Vayikra 19:18). Usually this trait leads to sinas chinam, baseless hatred, which is a transgression of the commandment “You shall not hate your brother
in your heart” (ibid. v. 17). Baseless hatred was the sin which brought about the destruction of the Second Temple (Yoma 32b). Moreover, the Talmud states that because of baseless hatred, strife abounds in one’s home and tragedies may befall him (Shabbos 32b).
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This trait also leads to transgression of “With righteousness you shall judge your fellow” (Vayikra 19:15), which our Sages understand as a requirement to grant one’s fellow the benefit of the doubt (Sanhedrin 34b). Sefer Chareidim (66:39) writes that one who
judges his fellow critically becomes attached to one of the spiritual forces of impurity.
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Judging others hypercritically causes one to suspect the innocent of wrongdoing. Our Sages teach: “One who suspects the innocent is afflicted physically” (Shabbos 97a). Inevitably, he will also transgress the sins of causing hurt through words, embarrassing
one’s fellow, and causing strife — whose punishment is particularly severe.
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Thus, one who seeks a life that is good, both in this world and the next, should distance himself from this terrible trait.
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 141 – Thorough Understanding???????????
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Condition #2:
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Even when one has personally witnessed a situation, he must avoid hastily concluding that one party has harmed, or is about to harm, another. Often, it is impossible to fully understand the attitude and behavior of one person towards another without a thorough
knowledge of their relationship until this point. What appears to be a sinister plot might actually be a plan of self defense. Exposing the “plotter” in such a case might leave the real victim vulnerable and defenseless.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Negativity
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Yet another primary cause of speaking loshon hora is? negativity, as it is written? “And you spoke very negatively in your tents and said ‘Because of Hashem’s hatred for us did He take us out of [the land of Egypt]’ (Devarim 1:27)”. There are people who are
wont to complain and find fault at every opportunity, to criticize the ways and words of their fellow even when, in fact, he acts toward others with sincerity and has not caused them the slightest bit of harm. Such people never give others the benefit of the
doubt; they assume every unintentional wrong to be deliberate, and are certain that it was done with malice. Whoever is afflicted with this terrible trait will speak loshon hora regularly, for he will view whatever others say or do as intended against himself.
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One who seeks to rid himself of this destructive trait should contemplate its various ill effects; through such reflection, he will ultimately succeed in viewing others in a favorable light.
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 139 – Nothing to be Gained??????????
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In a situation where a person has been caused damage, it is forbidden to inform him of the perpetrator’s identity unless there is a reasonable chance that this will serve a constructive purpose. The fact that one personally observed
an improper act does not automatically justify informing the victim. If restitution seems unlikely and there is no possibility that the victim will unsuspectingly be vulnerable to further harm, nothing positive will be accomplished by telling the victim who
was responsible; to reveal the perpetrator’s identity is to speak rechilus.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Within Everyone’s Reach
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Any Jew who reflects upon his ways regularly, and resolves to scrupulously refrain from speaking the forbidden, will surely succeed in attaining the quality of shmiras haloshon. As our Sages teach, one who seeks to purify himself is granted Heavenly assistance
(Shabbos 104a). They further state that if a person sincerely strives to be a tzaddik (righteous individual), then Hashem will assign him an angel who will treat him as a tzaddik; and if he will sincerely strive to be a chassid (exceedingly righteous individual),
then Hashem will assign him an angel who will treat him as a chassid (Tanna D’vei Eliyahu Zuta ch. 3).
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The Talmud qualifies the statement, “Everyone is [guilty of speaking] loshon hora” (Bava Basra 165a) by saying that this refers not to actual loshon hora, but to avak loshon hara (the dust of loshon hara); that is, statements which can lead to loshon hora being
spoken or from which negative information can be inferred.1 Moreover, Maharsha (ibid.) comments that “everyone” refers only to a person who is not careful in matters of speech, and speaks whatever comes to mind. Such a person will surely be guilty of speaking
avak loshon hora. The Sages did not, Heaven forfend, mean that it is impossible for anyone to be free of this sin. With knowledge of the relevant laws and proper zealousness, any Jew can acquire the golden quality of shmiras haloshon.
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1. As an example, it is forbidden to praise someone in the presence of his enemies, as his enemies will probably respond by voicing their criticism of him.
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Keep reading Day 140, the lesson for Shabbos
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 138 – Constructive Intent?????????????
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People who speak rechilus usually have some motive in mind which they consider a positive one. The Torah’s view, however, is that unless the motive is clearly constructive, the speaker is doing nothing more than gossipmongering
and his words are strictly forbidden.
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The most common constructive motive that would permit relating such information is to forewarn a person of someone else’s intent to harm him so that the person can protect himself; to inform a person that someone is presently harming him, so that he can put
an end to the situation; or tell a person that someone has already harmed him, so that he can seek restitution for the damage (if it is monetary) or at least prevent any further damage.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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In Man’s Hands
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God has made man upright, but they sought many intrigues (Koheles 7:29).
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The Holy One, Blessed is He, Who is upright and righteous, created man in His image so that he too would be upright and righteous. One may ask: If so, then why did God create the evil inclination, as it is written, “The imagery of man’s heart is evil from his
youth” (Bereishis 8:21)? If God Himself refers to this inclination as “evil,’’ then who can possibly transform it into something good?
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God responds: “It is you who has made it evil! As a child, you did not sin — it is when you matured that you sinned! There are many items in this world more rigid and bitter than the evil inclination, yet you make them sweet. There is nothing more bitter then
turmusin, yet you diligently cook it seven times until it turns sweet ... surely then, you can do the same with the evil inclination that is given over into your hands” (Midrash Tanchuma, Bereishis 7).
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The intent of the above Midrash is clear. Hashem has given man the ability to subdue his evil inclination, so that it can be utilized in accomplishing his spiritual goals, as it is written, “... yet you can conquer it [the evil inclination]’’ (Bereishis 4:7).
It is man alone, through his ways and deeds, who determines who will be the victor in this crucial struggle.
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Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation · 361 Spook Rock Rd · Suffern, NY 10901-5314 · USA
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 137 – Constructive Speech?
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As in the case of loshon hora, the prohibition of rechilus involves meaningless or destructive gossip only. Reporting to a person concerning what someone else said or did against him l’toeles, for a constructive purpose, is not
considered speaking rechilus and may, in fact, be considered a mitzvah.
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However, a clear understanding of the conditions which make such reporting permissible, complemented by a generous dose of objectivity, are absolute prerequisites for conveying such information.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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Despair
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Another primary reason why people speak loshon hora is despair, meaning that they despair of being able to live by the Torah’s laws of proper speech. There are those who convince themselves that anyone who interacts with others in normal business and social
relations cannot possibly live by these laws. To support this contention, they cite the Talmudic statement that “everyone is guilty of loshon hora” (Bava Basra 165a).? Of course, they are grossly mistaken.
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It is a known axiom of Jewish belief that Hashem does not make excessive demands of His creations. If the Torah places a certain obligation upon us, then surely its fulfillment is within our reach. Would adherence to the laws of shmiras haloshon be an inordinately
difficult achievement, then it would be optional, a matter for the exceedingly righteous who strive to perfect themselves in ways that others never attempt. In fact, to refrain from speaking loshon hora is required by the Torah, and involves numerous commandments.
Obviously, the Creator has endowed every Jewish soul with the ability to observe these laws.
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“A God of faith without iniquity” (Devarim 32:4) — God created man to be righteous, not wicked (Sifre ad loc.). This means that Hashem endowed each Jew with the ability to observe all of His commandments, for if not, it would be unfair to hold him accountable
for their transgression.
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SEFER CHOFETZ CHAIM
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Day 135 – Sensitivities
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To cause outright animosity between Jews is to speak rechilus; to effect a minor degree of ill feeling between Jews is to speak Avak Rechilus. An example of the latter is where one relates that someone spoke about the listener in
a manner which is neither derogatory nor harmful, but which may cause the listener to be disappointed with that individual. The classic example of this is where Hashem spoke critically to Avraham of Sarah for her having expressed incredulity upon hearing an
angel (disguised as a wayfarer) say that she would bear a child. Hashem said, “Why did Sarah laugh, to say, ‘Shall I in truth bear a child, though I have aged?’ ” (Bereishis 18:13). In fact, Sarah had said, “And my husband is old.” (V. 12). Talmud Yerushalmi
(Pe’ah 1:1) states that to repeat such a statement would be to speak avak rechilus. Now, to say that a man of ninety-nine is old is neither derogatory nor damaging. However, it is a bit discomforting for a person of advanced age to hear that his spouse speaks
of him as an “old man;” therefore, to report such a remark is to speak avak rechilus.
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SEFER SHMIRAS HALOSHON
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More Points to Ponder
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One should ponder the severe retribution, both in this world and the next, which is liable to result from arrogance. The Talmud states that arrogance causes one’s properties to become ruined (Succah 29b) and one’s resources to become depleted (Sotah 5a). The
Sages further state (ibid.) that regarding an arrogant person, Hashem says, “He and I cannot dwell together in the world.’’ Rabbi Elazar said: “Whoever is arrogant will not awaken at the time of the Resurrection” (ibid.). This last punishment is measure for
measure. Instead of pondering the fact that he will ultimately be laid to rest in the earth, the arrogant person acts as if he will enjoy prominence forever, living a life of stature in which he will always be a notch above everyone else. Because of his sinful
attitude, when his body will become part of the dust of the earth, it will lack the power to come back to life. When everyone else will return to life, he will remain asleep, underneath the feet of the people above whom he had glorified himself.
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Furthermore, arrogance makes one repulsive before Hashem, as it is written, “Despicable to Hashem are all who are arrogant of heart” (Mishlei 16:5).
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