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My mother-in-law told me that she would like to start "reading with" my daughter (who is nearly 7). She further explained that she wants to go to the library and get some of those "pre-school type reading books" and have DD read to her. I am not sure about this. In other areas I don't have hesitations with Grandma wanting to "teach" DD (crafts, cooking, etc). I have read some of the experiences with parents regretting the reading lessons they tried to impose on their not-reading-yet children and I don't want DD to end up feeling small because of it. I can hear my own advise to someone else being to ask Grandma to only read to her instead, but DD doesn't like to be read to. She enjoys going through picture books and "being the pages" where we make up converations and interactions with characters. Should I ask Grandma not to ask DD to read to her? Should I let it play out? If this happens at the library and I am not there, then I wouldn't be able to stop things if DD were uncomfortable. I appreciate your advise! Lollizah

Learn Nothing Day is nearing. July 24. That's the day of "give it a rest" for unschoolers. Some things were published last summer that I've linked here. A blogpost by Cecelie Conrad, and interview of me (video or audio, all linked there). https://learnnothingday.blogspot.com/2024/07/cecilie-conrad-on-learn-nothing-day.html You can subscribe to that blog; it's NOT busy. A post or three each year, in July, pretty much. If you go in with a computer, there's a randomizer, and a list of all the posts. There are only 97 of them, and most have art. That guy is the randomizer, and was built by MD Polikowsky (with help from his mom, Alex), in 2008. Time passed. He's going to university soon to study physics, but in 2008, he was making some Roblox art for Learn Nothing Day! (More is at the bottom, here: Image Entries, 2008 Learn Nothing Day -- (If this doesn't look like Sandra Dodd's e-mail, it is one. "AElflaed" is my medieval-studies/SCA name.)

Something new has been added, about five up from the bottom, at "If Only" https://sandradodd.com/ifonly "If Only I'd Started Sooner..." a collection of wishes and regrets Amy Childs, in 2014, in closing a podcast called "Learning from Screens" wrote something worth transcribing and saving, ten years out. I had not embedded that episode on my site because there are a couple of things I couldn't be there to defend, and I didn't support, partly in the comments that show at the WayBack Machine save, but GOOD NEWS: The sound file works there, now (used to cut off, but didn't today!), and Amy's closing was powerful. Amy Childs, at the end of "Learning from Screens" My biggest regret is not trusting my kids about TV and video games all along. Some of my most cherished memories include times of watching or playing something on a screen with my kids. Some of my own favorite childhood memories are TV shows, and watching sports with my family. I can’t believe it now, looking back, that I limited the number of cherished memories and learning moments back when I was limiting television and "screen time." I wish I could go back and do it better, but I can’t. My turn with little kids is over. If your kids are still little, I hope you’re enjoying every moment that you can with them, and not wasting any stupid moments judging, evaluating, or regulating their curiosities, their interests, and their fun.... Please, everyone, please—do a better job than I did. —Amy Childs, 2014 https://sandradodd.com/ifonly

I've been cleaning up this page today, and I added a video that starts where Pam Sorooshian is talking about college-level students who want to regular school, and the difference in students who go to college without years of schooling before. https://sandradodd.com/teen/college There's also a section with good reasons NOT to create a transcript after unschooling. :-) Sandra

New on the site, four topics have additions, or are being announced: Who Inspired You? two new stories added at SandraDodd.com/inspiration "What can I say to doubters and critics?" (This page isn't new, but wasn't announced before.) https://sandradodd.com/school/say Additions to the page on what might happen without structure: https://sandradodd.com/structure Just finished (started and then misplaced it): Moving (making it easier) https://sandradodd.com/moving _____________________ If you use the first link, you'll get - all the rest - a photo and link to a "just add light" post with a nice comment - a randomizer (if you're on a computer, for sure; maybe from a phone) to other posts, or - the ability to scroll back through other site announcements to find pages you didn't know about, or had forgotten and could use again. I've added a few dozen links that weren't at the randomizer, too. so that's up over 850 pages. https://sandradodd.com/random

Leah Rose wrote something beautiful about moments, and it only taking a second to do better. She quoted and credited me. https://smartymom.substack.com/p/building-better-moments I added that link and an image with the quote to this page: https://sandradodd.com/moment Moments: Living in moments instead of by whole days Leah's article moves through toward quotes from the church she grew up in. It's more religious than I am (as are many people) but it's reinforcement for ideas if they're found down several trails, and bubbling up from more than one spring. Sandra

https://www.theconrad.family/blog/94539-self-directed-54 The Conrad Family #54 - Sandra Dodd | Unschooling thoughts on gaming, YouTube and the internet There are links to several podcast platforms there, and to a Youtube version, if you like to see facial expressions. The auto-generated transcript there is not very good. If you hear something worth quoting in Just Add Light and Stir, please consider transcribing it (or editing that part of the transcript) and sending it here or to me directly. Thanks.

https://www.theconrad.family/blog/94212-self-directed-53 Today I listened to this podcast interview: Jo Isaac | The Transformative Power of Self-Directed Education Nice title. Then I listened to another interview in the same series, of Robyn Coburn. I know time has passed. Many years have passed. Their children are grown (or nearly so, for Kai, but he's TALL, and employed). When I first met Robyn, and later Jo, I could hear Australia on Robyn (who grew up there) and England (fading) on Jo (for a parallel reason). Today, I heard how Australian Jo sounds and how NOT-so-Australian Robyn does. :-) So there y'go. Robyn is sounding American these days (or that day, anyway). Both of those were sweet, calming "listens." (Here's Robyn's, which I had linked separately before: https://www.theconrad.family/blog/94211-self-directed-52 ) Sandra

I haven't been keeping up with news like this! The link leads to lots of podcast sites, and also YouTube. https://www.theconrad.family/blog/94211-self-directed-52 Now I'm working on modernizing and stabilizing all the (many) pages linked from my Robyn Coburn page. It's a nice interview, and I heard stories I hadn't heard before, which I love, because I followed Robyn's unschooling progress as well as I could for a long time. :-) Sandra

Reaching out to this list in hopes that someone can offer some unschooling perspective or experience. The other day my daughter, 3 and a half, asked me, “Mommy, when will I go to kindergarten?” I told her that children don’t go to kindergarten until age 5, and asked what she thought would be fun about it. She said, “I don’t know. I just really want to go to kindergarten.” She has never been to daycare or preschool, although as a 1-2 year old she tagged along for drop off and pick up when her brother was at a part time play-based preschool. She doesn’t know anyone in kindergarten (we’ve gone on to unschool her brother, now 6 and a half). The kids she sees most regularly are the other members of our homeschool play group, none of whom has ever been to kindergarten. Her only knowledge of it comes from casual mentions and the many portrayals she’s run across in books and cartoons. So…how do I counterbalance the fictional portrayals to give her a meaningful and realistic sense of what school is? When I try to describe it to her, I hear myself sort of talking it down—which I actually don’t want to do! When she’s old enough, I do want to give her the choice to go to kindergarten if she wants to—but not just because Sister Bear had a really fun first day there in a Berenstein Bears book left over from my ‘80s childhood. Is anyone willing to share how you prepared a very young child to make a meaningful choice about school? Many thanks to anyone who takes the time to respond! sent from phone

https://sandradodd.com/alphabet I've just modernized this page, replaced one video code with a newer one, fixed links, added a credit.... There are four videos there and one song (sound recording provided by Jane Clossick, who was a mom in the discussion then and might still be here now :-)_ If you have younger kids, they might be interested in one or more of these. The music is interesting on all of them. The game discussed there, Metamorphabet, is on my iPad and my phone. My granddaughter who is 14 used to play it, and three little granddaughters (3, 4 and 5) play it nearly every time they're over here. It's art that does things, responds to touch, has sound... not "a game" one can lose, but more like a toy, and it reads itself to you. It's available directly and it's on Steam. Theres a link on the page, https://sandradodd.com/alphabet If people want to discuss the alphabet here, I'd be happy to. :-) It used to be crucial for looking people up in phone books, for finding things in dictionaries, for using a library. What now? It's fun to think about, and those songs are sweet either way. Sandra

In another topic I linked the page on coaching kids, about behaviors and situations. https://sandradodd.com/coaching Also, newer on the page, is a set or series of topics about parental attitudes that can hurt or help the progress and stability of unschooling in a family. I think the first of those was Seeing and Avoiding Negativity https://sandradodd.com/negativity Two of my favorites have not been linked much, anywhere: https://sandradodd.com/indignation https://sandradodd.com/outrage Indignation is like something has removed one's ability to be dignified—interesting idea. Outrage is like.... Donald duck in a fury. :-) And more recently, a pretty frosting on the cake of all the reminders about how negativity harms partnerships and relationships: Positivity https://sandradodd.com/positivity That links to pages on doing better, and on how families changed. I hope you find something soothing, or fun, and that life is somehow better, for those pages being there. Sandra

My plan, for the unschooling pages on my website, was to have three links at the bottom of each, and people could keep reading or stop. Some pages now have five, or eight links. And newer topics and sections hardly are linked on the older pages. https://sandradodd.com/coaching has links to several things that are newer, but fun and useful, so if you're an intermediate unschooler, maybe it would be good to have a peek. Beginning unschoolers are still wondering whether their kids will learn any geography, or how to spell, and I don't want to burden them with more philosophical bits. :-) Have fun in there, and if you have any stories to tell here, or maybe for me to add there, I hope you'll respond to this topic! Sandra

https://altomunschooling.dk/sandra-dodd/ Luna Maj Vestergaard interviewed me by e-mail for a Danish publication. I really enjoyed the exchange. There's a photo of me, and one of my grown kids there, too. She has imbedded links in the text, which is a civilized and useful way to do it! Here's the beginning: If you were to define unschooling in three words, what would they be? I wouldn’t. It’s too easy to mislead. Too often, people grab a phrase or idea and run off and make a mess with it. If it’s used lightly though, I don’t mind “learning from life”.

If we were not a "legacy group" rescued by Groups io (from the fall of yahoogroups a few years back), this group, with this many members, would be much more expensive. I just got this notice: "This is a friendly reminder that your Premium 开云体育 group [email protected] will be billed $220.00 on Monday, October 23, 2023 for the next twelve months." If you're financially comfortable and want to help defray the costs, there is a link to a paypal donation button at https://sandradodd.com/ ____________ It would be great if this group were busier, but even when it's quiet, it's like an important storage area in the Unschooling Museum that needs to be kept dry and secure and air conditioned. :-) There are many hundreds and probably thousands of links back to posts or discussions, all over my site. It really is the best unschooling discussion there ever was; I've been in dozens, over 30+ years. I invite questions about unschooling, or stories of successes, or of problems you've overcome. If someone finds an old discussion you'd like to stir back up, search around and comment; that would be fine, too. Thanks for reading, please write, and I hope unschooling is going well in your family, or that you're past those days and filled with happy memories. Here is a link to a photo of Pam Sorooshian (longtime moderator of this group, from the beginning, with me and Joyce Fetteroll). She was holding her first grandchild; there are four now. It's today's Just Add Light and Stir post, Choosing to relax. Sandra

One thing led to another, and I came upon something Linda Wyatt wrote in 2012. Some of you probably saw it then, but I saw it today, and now it's here: https://sandradodd.com/howto/lindaWyatt PLEASE read it when you have time and mood. It's probably the best list I've ever seen of what to do to make unschooling take hold in your soul, your life and your family. Some good parts are going to end up in Just Add Light and Stir, and Linda gave me permission to use some waterfall photos in that blog, too. The waterfall at the link above will lead to those others. Those are in rural New York, or some such. They excited me, because I'm in New Mexico, where waterfalls are very scarce. :-) I hope you enjoy that page and that maybe you have a friend who could use Linda's strong and solid introduction to unschooling. Sandra

Tomorrow is the 13th anniversary of Just Add Light and Stir. If you are not subscribed to that, and if you ever check e-mail anymore, I hope you will subscribe. Each day there is some info to think about (a quote from my site, usually, or maybe something written to match the photo), and a photo of something or someone being soothing or inspiring or funny, usually). I'm going to keep doing it, because the feedback is good. :-) https://justaddlightandstir.blogspot.com/ There is a randomizer (upper right from a computer, bottom center from a phone). You can go by the elements of the photos, too—from a computer, the tags are about the images, You can look at all the gates, or bridges, paths or rainbows. Sandra

The phrase "to grapple with self" showed up in a book I'm listening to, read by a reader I like, taking about psychology and Buddhist concepts, and how they can be seen together. I like the author. I like the topic! I do not like casual use of terms like "grapple" or "battle" or "struggle" used (increasingly, especially "struggle") about everyday thoughts and decisions. Please, if you hear yourself saying "I struggle with..." or you see yourself writing it, or you're even thinking it, stop. Stop struggling. Make choices. First, maybe, choose not to struggle. Make a choice calmly and happily and see how that feels. You can make another choice in a few minutes if that one seemed wrong. :-) It's true that psychotherapists deal with people who are paying money for help to avoid struggling, pretty often, but even then and there, using more peaceful terms should be helpful. Unschooling works better in the absence of struggle. Don't grapple with your self. Your self has enough problems. :-) https://sandradodd.com/struggle Sandra

I quoted from this page for today's Just Add Light and Stir post. https://sandradodd.com/gettingit Because of questions in the "last hurdle" topic, I thought I should bring it up. For those who have already read about deschooling, and feel themselves to be on a course (like a racetrack with hurdles, maybe?).... this will bring it all to a halt, because it's a collection of moments of epiphany or clarity—of leveling up. :-) https://sandradodd.com/levelup/ Here's the post with the quote. I went back to fix a misspelling, and while I was in there saw many things that could help in that other topic. :-) But anyone, even very confident and experienced longtime unschoolers, will find inspiration in these little stories of clarity. https://justaddlightandstir.blogspot.com/2023/08/life-is-more-fun-now.html

Question sent for me to post anonymously: ___________________ I feel like I've come so far in my progress towards fully unschooling, but in the end, I always bump up against the fact that it feels irresponsible to me. I'm talking about the bare minimum of helping them learn the very basics: this is how you write (forming letters, I mean; not sentences); or knowing their basic math facts and the concepts of arithmetic: I feel *irresponsible* not doing some things in a more "school-y" fashion. I would love some help in how to look at this differently....so far the responses I've gotten have been along the lines of "you need to deschool some more," and I'm going *yes!* I know! But how do I get around this wall, specifically? What would help me let go of this last little bit of academics? How do I let go (or maybe come to accept?) this feeling of irresponsibility? ______________________ Let's help think of how to clear this hurdle, but also, while we're at it... What are some other things people have "bumped up against" and had a hard time getting around, over, or through? Thanks! Sandra